Matthew Story

This morning I took Caitlin to school (Matthew stays home on Tuesdays) and as I was letting Caitlin out of the car, one of Matthew's teachers approached me and said, "Ok. I have to ask you a question" (never a good start...especially regarding Matthew).
"Who is Zarr?", she asks.
(a little background. zarr is a stuffed animal kitty of his that we make up stories about)
"Oh! Zarr is just Matthew's stuffed animal kitty, we sometimes make up pretend stories about him" I said...feeling relieved that this was all she was asking. But then:
"Is he flat?"
"F-flat?"
"And did he die?"
"wh-what?!"
"Is he flat and did he die?" she repeated, this time speaking slowly and giving me hand gestures to indicate flat...like that might be the reason i am acting confused.
"Noooo..I mean, he's just a stuffed animal. Fully stuffed, so, no. Not flat. And never really alive, so Im pretty sure he didn't die...why?"
"well...."

Eventually I got to the bottom of it...apparently Matthew's class has morning prayers and they allow the children to pray for whomever is sick or needs a prayer. I know for a fact that Matthew had been just praying for actual people that we knew early on in the year. But I guess that got boring, so Matthew decides to make up all sorts of horrific things about his animals thus creating a need to pray for them. Evidently zarr was "squished flat and he died" so Matthew told his class to pray for him.

Im gonna kill that boy! The preschool already thinks we're the Clampetts....now we are also running some sort of stuffed animal pet cemetery-esque fantasy land....